Doubt

Joshua De Gracia

Ever have those days where you feel like yelling at God?

You know what I mean right? Those times where you want to either roll up your car windows, go outside of your house or maybe stuff yourself into your favorite pillow and just scream your head off to God. Honestly, this is how the first two weeks or so of the new year has been for me.

Oh, did I give you a different mindset of me? Don’t get me wrong, I’m human and I make mistakes all the time. I’m simply an imperfect person doing his best to continue doing the will of our perfect Father.

Am I screaming to God because I fell into sin? No. I feel that I’ve been questioning God’s will and visions that He has given me the past few months or so. When God gives you a vision, revelation or a goal, it’s best to act upon it and obey. However, there is a perfect time for everything. The right thing at the wrong time is still the wrong thing and God won’t bless it because it’s on our timing and not His own. I need to continually remember this:

Isaiah 55:8

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.”

If you are wondering why I posted this and it makes no sense to you whatsoever, this is what I wanted to leave you with: There may be times when you don’t know what to do with your life. It may be concerning your job, relationship, goal, etc.. It’s okay to yell. Get it out of you and God wants to hear. Communication is a two way street. Now that God has heard us, we need to hear back from Him through His word and during prayer. It’s NOT okay to yell and take it out on others. It’s NOT acceptable to turn to things of the world such as alcohol, drugs, etc. during these times of frustration.

Psalm 46:10

“Be still, and know that I am God”

When we turn to things of the world, they bring us temporary happiness. The pain vanishes temporarily and then it returns with increased “hunger.” Be still and give your problems and anxiety to God. If you’re going through hell, keep going because God is right there beside you.

Through it all, I’ve really prayed my heart out and God has always given me a sense of peace. I am an imperfect person doing the will of our perfect Father and I know that God will always have my back.

"Sometimes you say to yourself: the fire in me is going out. But you were not the one who lit the fire. Your faith does not create God, and your doubts cannot banish Him into nothingness." -Brother Roger

"Questioning God’s existence is intimately united with the purpose of human existence. Not only is it a question of intellect; it is also a question of the will, even a question of the human heart." -Pope John Paul II